My sibling was always the favourite and I am still untangling what that did to me
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Whatever happens next, this moment of honesty already changed something. You cannot unsee a truth once you have said it out loud.
I went through something painfully similar last year. It does get lighter, not all at once, but in small unglamorous steps. Hang on to the tiny good moments.
I have lived a version of this. The guilt is loud now, but the self-respect outlasts it. Give it a little time and you will see.
Be patient with yourself. Healing is not linear and you are not failing just because some days feel like a step backwards.
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